Who am I, that God would want to use me? Fear and doubt often keep me from walking fully in the purposes God has for me. What holds you back? Do you find yourself asking this very question?
I recently completed a study with a group of women called “Unashamed” by Christine Caine. During the study, we discussed running away from God and hiding our shame. I had not even realized the shame I felt because of past experiences. What I love about doing Bible studies is often the very thing you are studying God uses to open your eyes to the very thing that your heart is struggling with. How good is He that He knows us so well that he provides opportunities for us to come running back to Him and allow Him to heal our hurts.
But as we discussed in the study, you have to first be willing to be honest about those hurts. For me I had to face the reality that the shame I carry is over my personality and wiring as a person, as well as shame for the dreams and hopes I have. Wow, even now I feel the deep hurt within. Have you ever felt such pain and hurt in your heart because of what others have said or done to you? Sweet friend, I understand. Maybe your shame is something entirely different than mine. But what I’m accepting right now is I have shame in my life and I have to make the choice to run to God or run from God.
What will you do? I struggle right now with what I will do. I know that to run to God I will find healing but first I must go through the pain to recovery. I must face my fears and doubts every step of the way. It will not be easy. But the hope I have in Jesus far out ways the pain of shame. So I pray for you tonight, as I cry out to God, may you be willing to run to Him! Pray for me, pray my head can follow my heart toward healing.
Be blessed dear sister!